Golfers that control their Emotions, go low
To WIN the Masters Golf Tournament, Emotional Intelligence (EI) is in play 90% of the time. The other 10% when a poor shot is hit, the golfer quickly regroups, takes a breath, and resets for the next shot. Staying in control of your emotions in golf even when the ball goes out of bounds or lands in the water, is key to a low score.
A temper tantrum never wins…
Emotional Intelligence is Key to lowering Misconduct
Here’s what we can all learn from successful golfers…
A majority of public servants (including Police, Fire, and Corrections) show up every day to serve the public with great intentions. But when something happens that throws them into a mental tailspin, their awareness gets blocked and they could go into ‘Block-out’.
In Golf and in Life, sometimes things go wrong. They can choose to get Angry, (which makes them play worse)… or they can take a breath, shake it off, and regroup their emotions before they hit the next shot.
Think of the last time someone sent you an ugly text or email, or you were yelled at for something you didn’t do… how did you handle that? Did you respond quickly in anger, or did you take a breath and wait to respond?
When our emotional well-being gets shifted negatively, misconduct can occur. These negative events or triggers can be connected to our ‘hot buttons’, or things that piss us off to a point that we can take our anger and frustration out on others.
When our emotions change suddenly in a way that spirals us downward, maybe even to a point where we are out-of-control, Block-out Syndrome can happen. And when we get to Block-out, nothing good happens.
We all have ‘Hot Buttons’
Are there things that make you instantly angry, feel your blood pressure go up, and make your drop down your Emotional LADDER? [Here are some answers we get in class]
- Getting Stuck in bumper-to-bumper Traffic
- Be disrespected or talked down to
- Condescending Behavior
- Witness Racism (Implicit/Explicit Bias)
- Child abusers / Animal cruelty
- Dealing with Alcoholics (my parents were alcoholics)
- Bullying and harassment (I was bullied as a kid)
- Working with angry co-workers Toxic Employees
When you spiral downward, chances are you are not using sound emotional intelligence. It’s difficult to make rational decisions, especially when the public is involved.
“When your hot buttons are engaged, we call it dropping down your emotional awareness Ladder. It’s okay to drop down, just don’t live down there!” ~ Randy Friedman, RITE Academy Training Director
Having high Emotional Intelligence is knowing what your emotions are at all times, and how to keep yourself in-check.
You own your emotions!
When you control your emotions, you can then have good behavioral self-control to make sound decisions. (i.e., like de-escalation communication techniques)
One would think that controlling one’s emotions would be easy, but to doing on a daily basis takes Practice, Practice, Practice.
Knowing what your emotions are at all times is critical in ensuring you are making the right decision, especially during highly critical situations, like rescuing someone in a fire, or use-of-force engagement.
Control Your ‘Hot Buttons’
Having negative emotions like Anger, Frustration, Blame and Fear, can cause you to act out inappropriately, escalating a situation unnecessarily. If you are experiencing negative emotions, then you are more apt to behave inappropriately. Chances are if you are out-of-control, then your co-worker may have to take over, ‘Duty-to-Intervene’ (Step-In, Tap-Out, and Take-Over)
Negative emotions like Anger, Frustration, Blame, and Fear can cause the following:
- Miss critical information
- Apply un-necessary use-of-force
- Cause harm to yourself, your co-workers, community
- Could be career-ending for the employee
- Lawsuits against the agency
- Distrust in the community.
We must learn to recognize ‘The Ticking Time-Bomb’ Public Servant, and help them before they explode, causing harm to themselves or others.
Where should Emotional Intelligence be taught?
- Basic Academy Training
- Annual In-service Training
- During Debriefings After Critical incidents
- Enhance the Agency’s Professional Workplace Culture
- Included in your Racial Equity Plans
Controlling emotions and understanding where you are emotionally is critical to a successful public service career.
When you control your emotions, you’ll control the situation!
RITE Training helps ALL public service agencies improve communication to avoid the Block-out Syndrome, to De-escalate situations, build Career resiliency, Leadership skills, and Departmental recruiting. See our EVENTS page for our next training. Contact us about RITE TRAINING at your agency.